I had a conversation with myself last night, re-imagining a previous conversation I had with God about 2 years ago. God was like, "I'm gonna sit here with my arms wide open, while you seek refuge in people and things that were not meant to shelter you, and I'll wait patiently for you to come back home to me." That moment with God 2 years ago was the beginning of my real relationship with God and my relationship with my purpose(s). As I watched things fall into place, in awe of the matchless moves of the universe pushing me toward my purpose (or myself), I never quite committed to the purpose; I never quite committed to God. I walked around God--around my purpose, around myself--but never stepped in.
Maybe this is you. This has been your life for years...going in and out of the revolving door that is God's arms. And God still loves, even when you're outside of the door. God still loves, even when your head is pressed up against the glass window of his arms, peering out at all of the worldly things you've left behind. Your fear of missing out trumps your trust in God...in yourself; yet, God still loves, even when you flirt with the idea of leaving his arms (again) for less practical shelter that will fail you. God still loves...me...you...them...even in the midst of ourselves. God's arms are ever-present; the doors are always open.
And then you realize that God's arms are your arms, that God is in you and you are in God. And you step into yourself for the first time.
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